The Beatles “1962-1966” on gorgeous red vinyl. Watch it spin, minions! #vinyl #vinyljunkie #vinylingclub

The Beatles “1962-1966” on red vinyl. Don’t act like your not jealous. #vinyl #vinyljunkie #vinylingclub

The Beatles “1962-1966” on red vinyl. Don’t act like your not jealous. #vinyl #vinyljunkie #vinylingclub

The Beatles “1962-1966” #vinyl #vinylingclub #vinyljunkie

The Beatles “1962-1966” #vinyl #vinylingclub #vinyljunkie

The Beatles “1962-1966” on gorgeous red vinyl. Watch it spin, minions! #vinyl #vinyljunkie #vinylingclub

All you have to do to keep a head coaching job in the NFL regardless of how mediocre you have been, is suck a set of toes like nobody’s business!

Don’t believe it?

Ask Jets owner, Woody Johnson…

Ol’ Sexy Rexy sure knows how to suck!

Both on, AND off the field…

Tony Romo? 

Kyle Orton?

The little kid from a local Dallas playground?

It simply doesn’t matter who this team lines up under center, right now.

They simply appear to be built to break hearts.

The “love able losers,” if you will.

Every year I go on a huge rant saying what it is I think they should do to right the ship, and it never happens.

So in short, things aren’t going to get better in Big D until Jerry Jones relieves himself of all football duties, brings in actual football minds to do those jobs, and simply writes the checks.

He doesn’t seem to be willing to do that, he doesn’t seem to want to fire Jason Garrett, and he just gave Romo a huge extension last year.

Sorry to say, Cowboy fans, I think the best thing you can hope for this season is that Jerry at least fires D coordinator Monte Kiffin.

Good luck.

Tony Romo?

Kyle Orton?

The little kid from a local Dallas playground?

It simply doesn’t matter who this team lines up under center, right now.

They simply appear to be built to break hearts.

The “love able losers,” if you will.

Every year I go on a huge rant saying what it is I think they should do to right the ship, and it never happens.

So in short, things aren’t going to get better in Big D until Jerry Jones relieves himself of all football duties, brings in actual football minds to do those jobs, and simply writes the checks.

He doesn’t seem to be willing to do that, he doesn’t seem to want to fire Jason Garrett, and he just gave Romo a huge extension last year.

Sorry to say, Cowboy fans, I think the best thing you can hope for this season is that Jerry at least fires D coordinator Monte Kiffin.

Good luck.

Mike Shanahan has been fired by the Washington Redskins.

Now in less predictable and more interesting news…I’m really craving Peanut Butter Crunch and I’m out of milk.

FML.

Mike Shanahan has been fired by the Washington Redskins.

Now in less predictable and more interesting news…I’m really craving Peanut Butter Crunch and I’m out of milk.

FML.

Da Bears should’ve known not to piss off that “Discount Double Check” guy….

Da Bears should’ve known not to piss off that “Discount Double Check” guy….

BALLER OF THE WEEK: Week 15

Kansas City Chiefs’ running back Jamaal Charles torched the Oakland Raider for 5 touchdowns on Sunday.

8 receptions for 195 yards and 4 TD’s, and 8 carries for 20 yards and a TD.

Charles’ 5 TD’s tied a team record, and he joined Jerry Rice, Shaun Alexander, and Clinton Portis as the only players since the merger to score five touchdowns and gain at least 200 yards from scrimmage in a single game.

Charles 195 receiving yards is also the most by any running back since Marshall Faulk in 1999, and he is the first player this season with 3 TD’s of at least 35 yards.

Stop kidding yourselves….

Every day, ESPN spends at least a half hour talking about “dark horses.” Guys that COULD give Peyton Manning and the MVP run he’s been on since Week 1, a run for it’s money, and take the NFL MVP award.

Every person reading this probably follows at least one sports blog that constantly says the top player on his/her favorite team is going to win the MVP award.

Well, unless you are a Broncos fan, and that player is Peyton Manning, you are absolutely, 100% kidding yourself.

Peyton Manning has 47 touchdown passes, 3 shy of Tom Brady’s all time single season record with 2 weeks to go. He’s averaging over 3 scoring tosses a game. Do you really not think that record isn’t going down?

The man has completed 67.8% of his passes, 4,811 yards, 47 TD’s, only 10 INT’s, an 82.5 QBR, and a 112.9 rating.

People thought that he should have won it LAST season, despite Adrian Peterson falling a mere 7 yards short of the all time single season rushing record when he threw 10 fewer TD’s, and 1 more INT.

This year, the NFL’s leading rusher LeSean McCoy is 657 yards short of 2,000, Jamaal Charles is (one of the “dark horses” that is getting a lot of love after a 5 TD performance on Sunday) is 819 yards short or 2,000, and no other NFL QB has more than 34 TD tosses.

The NFL MVP is going to be Peyton Manning, and it damn well better be unanimous.

Any conversation that gives any other player a snowball’s chance on Miami Beach, is simply irrelevant.

Be smart, Green Bay…

With the final 2 games of the season coming up, 1 of them against the Chicago Bears, a game that could very well decide the division, the Green Bay Packers and their fans understandably want their former MVP QB back under center.

But the above picture is the closest one of the game’s top QB’s should come to “suiting up” on an NFL field for the rest of the season.

The Green Bay Packers should shut Aaron Rodgers down for the season.

No questions asked, just tell your team that Rodgers isn’t coming back in 2013, Nick Foles is the starter, and you are going to do the best you can. Then tell the press the same thing.

The Green Bay Packers as a team are 22nd in pass defense, 25th in rush defense, and I don’t know of many people that think that this team can get by Seattle, San Francisco, New Orleans, and Carolina WITH Aaron Rodgers.

So do the right thing.

Be smart.

Is the very slim hope of winning a Super Bowl in 2013 worth risking the long term health of a 30 year old QB who could very well be the best player in the league?

He’s 30 years old. He’s not a running back. 30 might as well be 20 for an NFL QB these days. You probably have 7-10 more shots at a Super Bowl title behind the arm of this stud of a QB.

Sit him for the season, make sure he’s completely healthy, and be back ready to contend next season.

The Green Bay Packers’ franchise has always been smart when it comes to rehabilitating their players. Why stop now? Especially when it’s your franchise player.

 


 

Oh Eli…

Eli Manning completed only 13 more passes to the boys in blue jerseys than he did to the Seattle Seahawks DB’s on Sunday.

Let that marinate for a minute…

The mind boggling 5 interceptions that Eli Manning threw against the Seattle Seahawks on Sunday gave him 25 for the season, a total that leads the NFL.

So we, as football fans, have to ask; what is wrong with Eli Manning?

Is the disastrous season the Giants have put up HIS fault?

Is it head coach Tom Coughlin’s fault?

Allow me to try to get to the bottom of this for you…

  • The New York Giants are an absolutely pathetic 28th in the NFL in rushing at 83.5 yards per game.
  • Andre Brown is the team’s leading rusher at an absolutely embarrassing total of 441 yards, including a measly 17 yards on 11 carries on Sunday.
  • Victor Cruz has only 4 TD’s this season, after a combined 19 the prior 2 seasons (dude has been contributing in burying my fantasy team)

All of that being said…

  • Eli Manning’s numbers are down in every single statistical category from a year ago, and his QBR is an abysmal 36.0, down from a career high 68.9 from a year ago.
  • Throwing INT’s is really nothing new for Eli. This is the 2nd time in his career he has thrown at least 25 picks, the 2nd time he’s lead the league in interceptions, the 3rd time he’s thrown at least 20, and he’s thrown 15 or more in 7 of his 10 seasons.

Eli is the one throwing the ball, and the Giants have lived, and often died by his gunslinger mentality. Reckless throws come with the territory of having Eli under center. But he has also won 2 Super Bowls for your franchise with his fearless throws.

The New York Giants have made a scary habit of coasting through the season and turning it on just in time to get into the playoffs in a week division, on an annual basis. And THAT falls squarely on the back of head coach Tom Coughlin.

The fact that the Giants’ are 28th in the NFL in rushing, and are lead in the category by a man who has fewer than 500 rushing yards on the season can’t be underestimated in all of this. The failure to get better in the run game falls mostly on the front office.

Bottom line, Eli has been bad this season. REALLY bad. But to say that the Giants’ unbelievably bad season falls solely on his shoulders is simply irresponsible.

Eli, Coughlin, and the G-Men front office should take equal responsibility in this total cluster fuck.

Mike Shanahan wants to come back to the Redskins in 2014…

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The word on the metaphorical sports “street” is that Mike Shanahan, head coach of the Washington Redskins, wants to return in 2014.

But naturally, the egomaniacal former 2 time Super Bowl winning head coach has a few conditions.

It isn’t enough that Shanahan is guaranteed $7 million in 2014 whether he coaches, or sits on his living room sofa eating Cheetos while laughing at Clay Matthews’ latest Fathead commercial, Mike Shanahan wants to return to the Washington Redskins’ sidelines in 2014 on the condition that he has complete control of the football operations for the team.

Now here is my problem with that…

WHAT has Mike Shanahan, in Washington, done to deserve that vote of confidence, ON TOP of a guaranteed $7 million?

Now 14 games into his 4th full season in DC, Shanahan is a combined 24-38, and 10 of those wins came in 2012, 7 consecutive after the team’s week 10 BYE when RGIII put the team and the city on his back.

Apparently, Shanahan thinks that the 2 consecutive Super Bowls that he won with top 10 all-time QB John Elway and Terrell Davis who had a 2,000 yard rushing season in that span in 1997 and 1998 have earned him lifetime immunity and clout.

Mike Shanahan, the NFL (and sports in general) are “what have you done for me lately.” And you are 24-38 in 4 seasons in DC, you are 50-62, including your last 3 seasons in Denver going back to 2006, and you insist on shoving your son Kyle down the throats of every team nice enough to employ you.

So here is what the Washington Redskins have to do….

  1. Back up QB Kirk Cousins was solid in his debut against the Falcons, and almost lead the team to a win. You need to hop he balls his ass off in your 2 remaining games, and hope that some NFL team will be desperate enough to deal you a 2nd or 3rd round pick in the offseason for him.
  2. You need to fire Mike Shanahan, Kyle Shanahan, and every coach on that staff.
  3. You need to bring in a coach that fully embraces RGIII as “his guy,” and an offensive coordinator that knows how to call plays according to RGIII’s abilities.
  4. You need to dedicate your entire draft to weapons at wide receiver, the offensive line, and defense.
  5. You need to sign a veteran, mid 30’s QB (Matt Hasslebeck for example) who will come in, understand that his role is to mentor RGIII, and give Griffin the confidence that this is his team.

Mike Shanahan, 2 Super Bowl wins in another CENTURY with John Elway under center do not give you full control of every football team you coach from the day of the second Super Bowl win forth.

Take your $7 million buyout, and sit down somewhere.

The Redskins, and more specifically Daniel Snyder, owe this to their fans.

Only the Dallas Cowboys…

What I am about to tell you is something that every man, woman, or child that has been a Dallas Cowboy fan for a decade or more almost certainly knows.

The Dallas Cowboys will break your heart.

Just when they are firing on all cylinders, the offense is clicking, the D is making stops, and they are winning convincingly the shit hits the fan, almost as if it were commanded to do so.

You see…simply losing isn’t good enough for “America’s Team.” They insist on losing in the most spectacular fashion known to man.

The Dallas Cowboys, currently in the midst of a battle with the Philadelphia Eagles for the woeful NFC East crown, took a 26-3 lead over the Aaron Rodgers-less Green Bay Packers into the locker room at the half on Sunday night.

And without that pesky “Discount Double Check” guy in the opposing locker room, it looked as if Romo and the boys had this game in the bag, and after an Eagles loss earlier in the day, it looked as if they would be ending this day tied atop the NFC East.

But assuming all of that was a lock to happen is essentially and admission that you do not know the way the Dallas Cowboys organization “rolls.”

After a 5 yard TD pass from Romo to Dez Bryant with 7:55 remaining gave the Cowboys a 36-24 advantage, any other fan base would be justified in exhaling, and preparing to celebrate victory.

NOT the Dallas Cowboys fan base…

For some reason unknown to me, and almost certainly every Cowboys fan on God’s green Earth, the Cowboys didn’t just simply place the ball in the hands of DeMarco Murray, who had already toted the rock 18 times for 134 yards and a TD on the day and run out the clock to victory. They aired it out, extended the game, and Tony Romo threw 2 interceptions to the Green Bay Packers’ defense in the final 3 minutes of the game, the first one giving Green Bay a chance for the go-ahead score with the Cowboys in position to run out the clock with a 36-31 lead.

The Packers Eddie Lacy then proceeded to run in the winning touchdown with 1:31 remaining.

And with that, the Cowboys blew a 23 point halftime lead to a Packers team minus Aaron Rodgers, and failed to take advantage of the Eagles’ surprising loss to the Vikings.

Ladies and gentleman….the Dallas Cowboys.

No doubt the Tony Romo “choke jokes” and memes are on the way right as we speak, and justifiably so. But at what point do we stop blaming Romo and start blaming a coaching staff that inexplicably had him throwing the football with a 5 point lead and a back that had already run for 134 yards on the day?

Romo has made quite a habit of coming up small in big time moments over the last several seasons, but this one did not have to happen.

Perhaps, after all of these years, we should stop pointing the finger at Romo, Jerry Jones, or whoever may be roaming the Dallas Cowboys sideline at that particular moment and simply accept the undeniable evidence in front of us that all points to one thing….

The Dallas Cowboys are a heart breaking, roller coaster reality show in a $1 billion stadium.

 

Mr. Heisman

Freshman quarterback Jameis Winston of the #1 ranked Florida State Seminoles became the youngest man to ever win the Heisman trophy on Saturday night.

Winston received 668 first-place votes and 2,205 points on his way to finishing 1,501 points ahead of Alabama quarterback AJ McCarron. It was the seventh-largest margin of victory in Heisman history, and Winston accomplished it despite being left off 115 of the 900 ballots that were returned.

Obviously, the only reason any person would ever even think to leave Winston off of the ballot after he lead his team to an unbeaten record, a #1 ranking, and a date in the BCS National Title game all while throwing for 3,820 yards, 38 touchdowns and leading the nation in passer rating at 190.1 is  because the freshman was accused of sexual assault and was cleared in the investigation a mere four days before the vote was due.

As it turns out, not even sexual assault accusations could keep Mr. Winston from hoisting the Heisman.

But Auburn may have something to say about him adding a National championship to his already historic season…